Failure makes you miserable...

...but it is up to the individual as to how he or she channels that misery.
I am facing such a situation right now. I prepared hard in the limited given time, but i lost out nonetheless. Not making it through in a competitive exam is something which almost all people of my age may have experienced at some point or the other in their life. It leaves one broken hearted for some time. but extending this time, will only work in a negative way.

I say...be broken hearted, like i am right now, but don't stay broken hearted. I feel terrible about it. the questions were not that tough, in fact the GK part and the English part was a like a cakewalk. I know I did well in those parts, but faltered in the crucial part of law. I was grossly under prepared, and almost scampered through with my preparation for the exam. I had not even taken coaching for it. but still, I know, if I had like a month or two more, it would not have been like this. but talking in retro is useless. I know that, so I am not going to turn it into a vicious circle of self pity.

I shall think about the future and work for it in the present...

That is how I am going to achieve something, else I'll always be stuck in the past, reminiscing about the lost chances and silly mistakes i made over the course of time. yes, I'll always keep in mind the Mistakes I made, but I wont dwell on them. Cos that would endanger my future seriously.

But humans are emotional creatures. so it will take some time for me to get over myself and not be so pissed at the lost chance. there will be chances in the future. and they are coming fast. so I better get my act together.

Another thing is- Expectations. Its a tricky issue. knowingly or unknowingly, the people who know me, or the ones who care for me, do have these expectations from me. that I will do something brilliant in life, and achieve something mammoth sized. It weighs me down sometimes, but I know, its all in a very well meaning vein. but when I see shoulders drooping, and hear the sighs of my loved ones at my loss, I feel double dejected. again, humans are emotional, I am a human, so..... :/

but I know, if I let these things bog me down. I will never be able to do anything substantial in life. so that would be the ultimate blow to them and to me (the most). so I have not stopped working/studying in order to be nearer to success.

it was tough. i had a bad headache last evening, and I could not sleep properly last night. but as said by Dr.A.P.J.Abdul Kalam -
"Dreams are not what you have when you sleep, dreams are those that don’t let you sleep"

so my dreams and aspirations were not letting me sleep. now that's not a bad sign at all. is it? LOL